Assertiveness and Control – Warrior
Protectiveness – Guardian
Energy for Change – Magician
Voluntary – No important urgency, however the more ambitious, the greater the change you are seeking to address, the more resistance from the subconscious. Based on the instinct of survival with the subconscious here to keep you safe, and safe (security) is what is familiar, so why would the subconscious make changes that might possibly create some sort of risk?
Conscious recognises Good or Bad, subconscious only recognises safe, or (security) in what is familiar. The database of what is known, pattern matching what is familiar, the internal Sat Nav that takes you where you want to go, based on the maps stored in the hard-drive.
To make Change work, it needs to be, Bigger and Better than the current plan, and must be seen in a very Positive Light.
It needs to be Crystal Clear!
What do you want?
Why do you want it?
How will life be when you get it?
Is this Change the most important thing in your life?
If there is something more important, then you must choose between.
- Switching your plan to the one of greater importance.
- Genuinely shelving the second plan to give full concentration to whatever you originally seek to do.
Failure usually occurs because….
It wasn’t 2PF, leading to poor preparation, or something else was creating a diversion.
What You Perceive can be Achieved with Plausibility, Possibility and Fairness!
Enforced – Life dump!
This can happen in a small way, a small piece of litter that can be disposed of easily, or a whole skip load or even a full truck load, all in one instance, or a series of events that cumulate into a huge pile, that we have no idea how we might cope, never mind how we might find resolution to begin to unravel and dispose of the huge, unrelenting mess.
First step is to Accept this double truth.
You Are in this unwelcome situation, and You can gain at least a small measure of control!
Waiting to see how ‘things turn out’, could create negative change!
Creating the beginnings of a ‘rescue plan’ can create a positive outcome!
By creating positive outcomes, we can prevent the subconscious relying on the familiar of what is secure, and if negativity forms part of that security, we need to create the Positive Light, rescue plan ASAP!
Bus Stop Syndrome (A regular occurrence stays the same, unless something outside creates an excuse or a reason to change).
This has far more to do with personal relationships than business, financial or health matters but it is worth noting, that this Bus Stop Syndrome can lead to awkwardness and missed opportunities, and to succeed, and make change we need to be the ‘Something’.
Create your own excuse or reason to change!
Make it Bold!
Make it Bigger and Better!
Or stay the same!
We see the same people at the bus stop each day, but only begin speaking to them, the day the bus fails to show up, because a reason for change has been created. We failed to speak to them, even thought we would be familiar to them and have at least one thing if not more in common because we all get the same bus every day, with some alighting at our stop or the one before, for the simple reason, we failed to connect at the first time of meeting.
If we fail to connect with people, we may fail to connect with opportunity, and what the both have in common is both people and opportunities are everywhere!
- Arguments carrying on long past the initial event or feelings of anger.
- Not asking someone for help, because we never have done.
- Not addressing irritating situations, because we never have done.
- Not contacting someone, because we never have done.
This can translate into
- Carrying negative habits or behaviours far beyond the initial event.
- Not changing the triggers that led to a habit or behaviour.
- Not addressing the negative parts of the habit or behaviour.
- Not looking for alternative, more positive habits or behaviours.
This is a syndrome that can be quite difficult to get out of… unless you begin to create that change in your mind, the change that’s necessary for success, without waiting for any physical change to happen within your environment.
This may seem fruitless, however by imagining an action can create activity in the neural pathways in the physical brain that are associated with that activity.
We are creating new maps for the subconscious to bank in the statistical hard drive, and the subconscious will readily accept these patterns as maps, even if they haven’t even happened yet, if they meet 2PF.
This is how survival works!
Subconscious keeps us safe!
Safe is what is familiar, and that forms security.
Familiar is what is already found in the subconscious that forms part of the pattern match.
Security does not have to be correct, it only has to be what is familiar.
Subconscious doesn’t have a logical thinking part, it has no concept of Good or Bad.
Only what is familiar, and repeated habits or behaviours are familiar and familiar is safe and safe is security.
So, if we need to change a pattern, habit or behaviour….
We need to start thinking about what you want to happen.
Stop finding a pattern match, by continued thinking of what is happening at the moment.
Get this wrong and you will be strengthening the ‘Bus Stop Syndrome’
Therefore, patterns get repeated, we are always waiting at that bus stop, doing what we’ve always done and expecting a different result.
It’s like waiting at the bus stop and expecting a different numbered bus to arrive instead of the scheduled one.
To create a new pattern for change, we need to adopt the MAGIC approach.
We also need to look at how we do things, because how we do some things, is usually how we approach all things;
This can help us to understand where our strengths are, and what we need to work on.
Assertiveness – can you stand your ground when faced with challenge?
Protectiveness – do you have an unshakeable urge to guard and keep safe?
Change – How do you feel about the process of change?
If a similar story to yours was in the newspaper, would you want to read it, how newsworthy would it be, how much space would that story be given?
If we’re brutally honest, we will discover the same truth as everyone else, we are simply not newsworthy, and that’s a good thing too….
Talking is a great therapy, but it depends on who’s listening….
If the person who’s closely involved with you is listening, it is usually very easy to:
- Stray from the point
- Blame or criticise the other party
- Seek sympathy or pity
- Seek to avoid responsibility
When we talk things through, we should always strive to seek a way forward!
If only by feeling emotionally lighter, however as soon as the above agenda’s get in the way, it will soon become apparent that no constructive outcome is possible.
Listeners are not always able to keep their part, often straying into the very same agenda’s.
And we cannot change others, not without their permission anyway, and those close, often want to help, but to create lasting change, we must change it for ourselves.
And for this to happen we need to start taking full responsibility for our own selves, to regain complete control, of what is our life, to be completely at ease and in control of YOUR LIFE.
These Basic rules apply
- Keep to the point
- Begin every sentence with I, not He or She, They and especially You
- Accept responsibility for your part in the problem and the solution
- If things begin to get uncomfortable or argumentative, end the discussion immediately and graciously
And when it all goes wrong….
- There were too many unforeseen difficulties
- I gave it my best shot and no one else could have done it any better
- I got let down by others
- I got no back up at all
- I’m jinxed
- There was a vendetta against me
- It wasn’t meant to be
- Goalposts kept getting moved
- The bank pulled the plug at the wrong moment
- Someone else wrecked everything
- The bottom just dropped out of the market
When all the happened was…
- I got it wrong
Accept full responsibility for whatever happens!
You are 100% totally in charge and cannot be stopped in your endeavours by anybody or anything!
You decide from this very moment, that you, are going to be the master of your own destiny, or that you, already are the master of your own destiny, think it, feel it, be it!
Because whatever happens, you, will be able to work out exactly how you, did it, and if it turns out, not to be what you, wanted, you, will be able to sort it out, and if everything goes absolutely per plan, then you will know that you, achieved it all by your own efforts.
And that will leave absolutely no reason on earth to doubt, that you can be in such Full Control of your life, even when the entire universe has dropped a massive F bomb on your head, as some kind of cosmic joke, that you Will be able to sort it out.
You are not powerless!
You can still take that situation and make something out of it!
You will become unstoppable!
Your situation exists to help you find what you desire!
When something goes wrong you can look at it in one of two ways.
It was nothing to do with you, not your fault, even if the same thing keeps on happening.
Recognise what part of the problem belonged to you, and what you could do in the future to evoke a more positive difference, so that next time, you will spot a potential problem quicker and help everything to work out as it should.
To become the master of your own destiny, you will recognise and accept responsibility, when it comes to problems, no matter who made them, as it is not important where the problem stems from. ALL that is important is that problems get resolved, and that part is your plan, to are the one with the responsibility of resolving them, it is ‘part of the deal’ it comes with the territory or controlling your destiny!
Just that one idea alone, can be enough to make magical things happen.
So, start by getting control right now!
Start formulating the foundations of your plan!
Lay them strongly and thoroughly!
And this is where MAGIC! comes in, but before that begins, there is one important question!
What is it precisely that you want to achieve?
We want a firm, and concrete achievement here.
To just ‘make something’ of yourself will not do!
You could make; an exhibition, a total failure, a complete idiot, and arse of yourself.
Because that was not what you meant, but the subconscious does not know Good or Bad, and will find what you seek using pattern match data.
So, if you do not make yourself clear, you will find the subconscious patterns that match without any logical thought processes being involved.
You need to be clear so that there will be no doubt, no pattern match for what you don’t want.
Whatever you do want, make it as specific as possible and make sure it passes the 2PF test. Plausible, Possible, Fair.
If your Goal passes the test it has a much higher rate of success, and you owe it to yourself to start creating positive success.
As with all things in life……. Be sure to enjoy everything you do!
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